An important part of parenting is to keep your child safe and to help them in making the right decisions. It is because of your strong parental instincts that you are forced to constantly check in with your kids and to even get in touch with their friends parents to simply make sure that they are under supervision. However when it comes to spying, is that considered to be too far? It is quite possible that your desire to keep your child protected could lead you to cross a line which could cause damage to the relationship you have with them.
So how does a parent watch over his child in a responsible manner without becoming overbearing and crossing a line which could lead to even bigger problems? A parent can start by asking the following questions to them:
- What is my motive?
Question yourself why you feel there is a need to spy on your child. Is it something which is truly necessary and is your child truly in danger that you need to commit such an action? If there actually exists some danger then monitoring them could be a good idea which can help keep them safe however if your child is a good and responsible kid then perhaps chances are that you’re being paranoid. It is understandable that you would want to protect your teen from getting into any harm but until there is a legitimate reason, think twice before spying on them.
- Is it worth the risk?
One of the benefits of spying is that it will allow you to have access to information which can help you take action before anything bad happens to your teen. The downside however is that it could lead to a disruption in trust. You will not be able to trust Your teen if you find things they haven’t told you. However if they find out you’ve been spying on them, it could also lead them to stop trusting you. It could also lead them to engage in even more devious and dangerous behavior which is why you should truly ask whether or not spying is worth it.
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- Is there an alternative to spying?
There are a number of better options which emphasize that conversation and accountability should be used instead of spying and secrecy to get to know what your child is up to. If you need to be extra vigilant then the best solution would be to be upfront about the matter and let your child know that you will be keeping tabs on him. Let them know you’ll be keeping a watch on their texts and emails and that if they’re going to someone’s house, you will be calling to make sure their parents are home for supervision. This way they will be aware that you’re checking up on them but that it is happening in an open manner and if they do end up doing something wrong, the two of you can discuss it without disrupting the trust between you both.
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